I knew I should have expected this... but if that hack provided northward isn't adequate (I haven't gotten it to work on the wiki I use most), I will have to stop using all Wikia wikis, including the one I admin (where I'm the only active admin AFAICT). Oasis doesn't play nice with my disability (it's just got a lot going on and a lot of options hidden in dropdowns... stuff you couldn't fix without overhauling the whole skin), and in the past it hasn't played nice with my computer, either. (I've had it disabled so long I don't know how it plays now.) Without a usable alternative, I am completely unable to work through my editing duties long-term.
Four days is not enough time. It's often (though weirdly less as of late) that I get exasperated with your handling of Monobook issues, but it's actually rather rare that I get openly, publicly exasperated. I'm appalled.
(Extra note: This is petty, but I'm extra upset it's getting removed on my birthday. XP)