User blog comment:ForestFairy/How to resolve conflict/@comment-26880402-20150823165703

One of the most important things I have learned is a technique called Active Listening. Too often when we listen we only listen to the surface of what is being said because we are already framing our replies. If we actually focus on the other person, their tone of voice, facial cues, body language, and what they are actually saying, comprehension rises dramatically. Unfortunately, email and other electronic posts lack all the cues and emotional elements of live conversation. A great piece of advice was given in the article. Wait a little while. If I write an angry or critical email, I follow the One Hour Rule. I wait one hour before sending and then reread it. I find I've often been too emotional, too critical because I was caught in the emotion of the moment. Anybody out there ever said anything they wish they could take back? By waiting, you can. :) If I feel I have to say something, instead of saying "That sucks, I didn't understand a word, be clear" I might say "There are some things I'm not clear on. Could you clarify some things for me?" Sometimes people have a great idea but didn't express it well the first time. By asking them to clarify you make them rethink it, and it turns out to be cool. Not always, but I know I've had a good idea and didn't present it well the first time. Finally, the most basic thing of all, passed down through the generations: never miss an opportunity to say nothing. Sometimes the smartest comment is the one left unsaid. If you took the time to read this, thanks. If you don't agree with me, then it's the perfect time to put what we've been reading about into practice. :) Wikia is one of my favorite places. I use it for everything from music history to biographies to game hints. Thanks to everyone that contributes for making my life better! :)