User:Comment Spae

Try to just be myself but constantly get denied of that opportunity by people who refuse to accept the things I do by mistake and by my autonomous thoughts. By all authority figures, and generally speaking, utter jerks who are lacking their own purpose in life and have to project their sorry backsides onto me.
 * -|What I do=

...As it turns out, I'm the only actually-competent human being on this freaking planet. I've noticed that whenever I make a genuine effort, someone either doesn't recognize it, or I'm correcting something that was already-made with gross incompetence. And whenever I try to pressure people into giving a care, they continue to never do and act like it's somehow good enough when it isn't. It's almost like I'm the only one capable of setting anyone on the right track in this broken world...and I definitely am. If I didn't exist whatsoever, I would not have been able to interfere with the "order" that is in certain pop culture communities and actually correct it beyond a lazy, self-serving effort. How come I'm the only one seeing things objectively here? Why is everyone else in the billions distorted with their belief they don't need to be serious when they do? ...How unlucky was I to exist in a world of fools and maniacs?
 * -|What I like=

Researching pop culture
Obviously, I like to research... but unfortunately, because I have to deal with the generic crowd due to targeting the "pop" stuff, I always encounter a smug, self-satisfied brat along the way who acts like they know the popular thing better but has nothing to prove it with. This is partially why I averted myself from the internet before, what with it being a tirade of pop culture and followers. I knew that oppression to drive me into feeling unappreciated for my efforts would occur if I tried on the internet of all places; years later, I have been proven of that. Note to self - targeting pop culture that is so blatantly pop culture as if no one will oppose me on it is persistently a bad idea and no one is in any gratitude of it.

...Maybe targeting pop culture without anything to support myself when around it was not the best idea. It is basically just me vs. the world quite literally. Was trying to stand out among generics who just want to ruin me really the best idea? ...I don't think so. Everyone's so painfully greedy, there's no such thing as 'empathy' anymore. I like pop culture... Just wish that the people surrounding this messed-up world weren't so bad that the whole collection of corrupted, self-centered, lazy ingrates wouldn't be so busy devaluing me while putting themselves on a pedestal like they're the greatest humans alive.

Going into places where pop culture brats are collaborated together when no one has been able to defend or uphold me my whole life? Yeah, not the best outcomes. There's a reason I've been willingly isolating myself. I can't rely on something that draws the masses in to have a community of good people who give a care... and I turn out right. They never do care, really. I am a mere disposable pawn for an argument. What a waste.

Speaking of which, TV Tropes in particular sucks because they're CLEARLY enabling bullies because those bullies don't "technically" break the rules. My ass. Someone called Perentie is clearly on there making others feel like garbage and being unwilling to ACTUALLY be of any help himself, uselessly putting down other people's contributions solely because he cares for no one but himself. ...Seriously, his only purpose in being there is to make everyone he encounters feel like GARBAGE. He does not care. Do not attempt to edit anything around the bastard known as Perentie, he will delete whatever doesn't fit his warped, self-centered worldview. And he'll talk down to EVERYONE just because he can, apparently, APPARENTLY. Pointing out obvious things (or in my case pointing out things I've already taken note of in some other format to make it out like he's the first to observe it) with the most condescending tone possible while denying what someone else says. What kind of life even IS that? How asocial does someone have to be turn out like THAT? ...Well, it's normal in this world, I guess, but unlike other people who act that way, Perentie filters all the 'humor as excuse' part out and makes himself dead serious about being a narcissist.

Also, The Amazing Digital Circus and its creator have zero clue as to what an anti-hero is, but they're too arrogant to care. Jax is one! You know why? Because anti-heroes AREN'T HEROIC BY DEFAULT.

Stampy's Lovely World
Stampy's Lovely World is a 2012 web series based on Minecraft that first began ten days following the release of Xbox 360 Edition, in the status of ongoing. Arguably the only actually revolutionary and consistent fan work based on the brand but its Briton creator is repeatedly undermined as a creative genius.

At this rate, I know he won't commit to his shout-out routine in regards to me, because I'm about the most vulgar audience member he can have and yet the most authentic because of it, due the vulgarity, he wouldn't want to call his audience of minors to someone like myself, no matter how much I present faith towards his identity in the form of being attentive to what he actually does as an entertainer instead of blankly posting about sentiments in regards to him, of which have no meaning at all for any reason in the long run, but regardless of my own infinite faith to his identity, what qualifies as not being approved of by him is when criticism is given towards him specifically in regards to the execution of something or praise is given instead but at the expense of criticising another thing. And as a viewer since the beginning year, I know that certain part of him didn't come with his master 'family-friendly' image upgrade in 2014 and was always there but locked behind his own state of vulgarity.

This is about one of the most objectively quality entertainment series that I know of, for many intentions, ranging from audience connection to creative intellect. Besides the main plot, which is always given attention from those who aren't truly dedicated, which is 130/392 of the audience of his, so things that aren't real plot are rarely given the attention they need equally, I actually like the building and construction aspect far more than anything else, because it's a case of real-time evolution. Stampy's real degree of intelligence, that he doesn't show through his family-friendly lens, is really shown through the buildings that he makes, combined with the luck of the seed he received in the game's 1.6.6 version, with his layout essentially allowing his world to be laid out in a perfect 'L' formation without having to deal with destroying mountainous landscape (having to do with quite the opposite actually), because if there is no world so far that does it, his world completely takes advantage of the visuals and atmosphere of Minecraft itself. In fact, the design of the main Minecraft world his identity is based on fits exactly into the intended visual ideas for the game and it's so perfectly produced that I almost don't believe that it's actually there, but it is, and so is he. Sure, he's featured on media exclusive to his origin country (Britain), but his world definitely doesn't fit just Britain. It's basically something that can be shown absolutely anywhere and no one can bat an eye, because he manipulates creatives styles in his own alternative way that it ends up being something generally applicable. Honestly, if there's one thing in Minecraft I could do for eternity, it's exploring and wandering around that world file, especially when it's complete, because it works so unbelievably well into the concept of the game.

Running time: [May 19th 2012] - [October 21st 2023].

Final builds: Sports Arena (Stampy's Town); Flower Power 2 (Stampy's Funland).

Series finale date: October 21st, 2023.

Series finale title: "Thanks For Watching".

Episodes

 * See all published episodes: Stampy's Lovely World episodes

Depeche Mode (frontman included)
Depeche Mode is a 1981 English electronic band, in the status of ongoing. And about the only music to actually qualify for every department that music as a concept asks for instead of what its respondents ask for.

Undeniably, it is the absolute oldest topic that I have listed here, dating back to 1981 and apparently even beginning at 1977 in actuality. And their longevity shows because they've basically covered every possible style in their own way that they can manage, such as stereotypical 1980s pop all the way through to 1990s to 2000s alternative rock and even their own signature style of alternative dance, with the rare ambient inclusion. With the way that it sounds, you'd think that it can take more than it does to record. Especially with such sophisticated sound design (maybe not with 2009 to 2017 albums but that's not a listener issue). Apparently not, they just need ideas and to hire the right people and hey, they come up with their style of sound. And honestly, I will never not like it, because no matter where they are or who they're associating with, they always do it just right, every single time. Why? Because it's always atypical, that's why. However, they don't just follow their personal alternative style, and try to fill the modern standards as they know the evolution of culture, so of course, they have countless club remixes for their tracks that add to their catalog.

Nothing they do regarding actually recording something is normal or expected, they always take the route of peculiarity, but they never go overboard. It's ironic, somewhat, because they came up with that alternative style all on their own. They came before a wide majority of singularly known signature songs, so their influences were rather limited for them to even make their first album, which is the epitome of their stereotypical 1980s pop style, stand out from others just like it. It sounds like every other synth-pop new wave album, but in reality, it's actually very different, not just because of Dave's voice, but because the wisdom that is behind everything following it is supporting the production. To be exact, they came before Madonna, "We Built This City", "The Final Countdown", "Fairytale of New York", "All I Want for Christmas is You", "Take on Me", "Girls Just Want to Have Fun", "Thriller", "Never Gonna Give You Up", “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go” and "Blue Monday". That's how little they had to base themselves off, and their first album still kicks their identity off to fantastic degrees.

I am an alternative person to the degree that they are, British too, so of course, if I was in their position, I'd have a similar style. Not an exact, but something alternative enough to sound worthy of listening for infinite repeats, for alternative people. It would entirely be an accident. I resonate musically with this group because I resonate creatively with them. And that would especially show if I had a studio with versatile degrees of gear where I could record and transform essentially any sound in existence, like they do, and could create anything without it sound like pain, like I've been forced to do since 2015 because I don't have their extreme degree of creative freedom. And since 2015, because the studio actually necessitates a generic sound that doesn’t fit my alternative approach, it contains toxic, generic people who constantly fault me without telling me why or even validating me to give me a reason to improve for them. And it’s no wonder, because they’re the the most plain people ever, who are only capable of thinking of music technically with no imaginative spark at all and always failing to comprehend how music can be produced intelligently instead of following with “what’s cool” or whatever the hell. I criticise them for not being alternative but they have no imagination so they end up taking it as insult to their approaches, even though the only one insulting approaches without giving a chance is them to me and not the reverse.

The main duo that makes the band, Dave and Martin, were both born in the early 1960s, the time when pinup models were essentially a normal thing no one batted an eye towards (at least better than the 2000s when people ignore explicit material). I mean, if you’re ‘’that’’ old, you might as well operate to your highest standard. And they certainly do, though not without adversity, as there is tension behind their outward musical satisfaction, to great and insurmountable degrees that would take forever to describe down to the last detail. Either way, they are experience in many a way, and that can’t be denied. They are their own person and their own sound. They are also, by proxy, extensions of their own sound, in a weird way. For example, if they aren’t going to release in a certain time through official means, they will instead find some other way. Depeche Mode 2000s has a good overall theme of sound, right? Well, as it would appear, even if Depeche Mode released ultimately rather infrequently during that period (four total albums; better than the two in the following decade but still), the quality of their individual recordings per that era compensate completely, since there is more than enough substance in each song to define the time in which they made it.

Also the constant leaking of Memento Mori has been a great suffering for me, as a dedicated fan who likes all their songs equally and tries to remain updated to anything they do no matter how small. Yes, even including the mundane ones that I could never imagine I would’ve liked because they retain the band’s unique charm. So, of course, I couldn’t just wait for the official sources to be released.

...However, as I realize, they are incredibly lacking in reason and substance, and their music is meaningless and arrogant. Maybe... NOT as great a band as I believe.

Albums

 * 1) Speak & Spell (1981)
 * 2) A Broken Frame (1982)
 * 3) Construction Time Again (1983)
 * 4) Some Great Reward (1984)
 * 5) Black Celebration (1986)
 * 6) Music for the Masses (1987)
 * 7) Violator (1990)
 * 8) Songs of Faith and Devotion (1993)
 * 9) Ultra (1997)
 * 10) Exciter (2001)
 * 11) Playing the Angel (2005)
 * 12) Sounds of the Universe (2009)
 * 13) Delta Machine (2013)
 * 14) Spirit (2017)
 * 15) Memento Mori (2023)

Singles

 * 1) "Dreaming of Me" (1981)
 * 2) "New Life" (1981)
 * 3) "Just Can't Get Enough" (1981)
 * 4) "See You" (1982)
 * 5) "The Meaning of Love" (1982)
 * 6) "Leave In Silence" (1982)
 * 7) "Get the Balance Right!" (1983)
 * 8) "Everything Counts" (1983)
 * 9) "Love, In Itself" (1983)
 * 10) "People Are People" (1984)
 * 11) "Master and Servant" (1984)
 * 12) "Blasphemous Rumours / Somebody" (1986)
 * 13) "Shake the Disease" (1986)
 * 14) "It's Called a Heart" (1986)
 * 15) "Stripped / But Not Tonight" (1986)
 * 16) "A Question of Lust" (1986)
 * 17) "A Question of Time" (1986)
 * 18) "Strangelove" (1987)
 * 19) "Never Let Me Down Again" (1987)
 * 20) "Behind the Wheel" (1987)
 * 21) "Little 15" (1988)
 * 22) "Personal Jesus" (1989)
 * 23) "Enjoy the Silence" (1990)
 * 24) "Policy of Truth" (1990)
 * 25) "World In My Eyes" (1990)
 * 26) "I Feel You / One Caress" (1993)
 * 27) "Walking In My Shoes" (1993)
 * 28) "Condemnation" (1993)
 * 29) In Your Room" (1994)
 * 30) "Barrel of a Gun" (1997)
 * 31) "It's No Good" (1997)
 * 32) "Home" (1997)
 * 33) "Useless" (1997)
 * 34) "Only When I Lose Myself" (1998)
 * 35) "Dream On" (2001)
 * 36) "I Feel Loved" (2001)
 * 37) "Freelove" (2001)
 * 38) "Goodnight Lovers" (2002)
 * 39) "Precious" (2005)
 * 40) "A Pain That I'm Used To" (2005)
 * 41) "Suffer Well" (2006)
 * 42) "John the Revelator / Lilian" (2006)
 * 43) "Martyr" (2006)
 * 44) "Wrong" (2009)
 * 45) "Peace" (2009)
 * 46) "Perfect" (2009)
 * 47) "Hole to Feed / Fragile Tension" (2009)
 * 48) "Heaven" (2013)
 * 49) "Soothe My Soul" (2013)
 * 50) "Should Be Higher" (2013)
 * 51) "Where's the Revolution" (2017)
 * 52) "Going Backwards" (2017)
 * 53) "Cover Me" (2017)
 * 54) "Ghosts Again" (2023)

Albums (Dave Gahan)

 * 1) Paper Monsters (2003)
 * 2) Hourglass (2007)

Singles (Dave Gahan)

 * 1) "Dirty Sticky Floors" (2003)
 * 2) "I Need You" (2003)
 * 3) "Bottle Living / Hold On" (2003)
 * 4) "Kingdom" (2007)
 * 5) "Saw Something / Deeper and Deeper" (2008)

Album Features (Dave Gahan)

 * 1) Soulsavers - The Light the Dead See (2012)
 * 2) Soulsavers - Angels + Ghosts (2015)
 * 3) Soulsavers - Imposter (2021)
 * 4) Kurt Uenala - Manuscript (2022)

Song Features (Dave Gahan)

 * 1) Junkie XL - "Reload" (2003)
 * 2) Mirror - "Nostalgia" (2008)
 * 3) SixToes - "Low Guns" (2013)
 * 4) "Cat People (Putting Out the Fire)" (2016)
 * 5) Null + Void - "Where I Wait" (2017)
 * 6) Goldfrapp - "Ocean" (2018)
 * 7) HUMANIST - "Shock Collar" (2020)
 * 8) Jennylee - "Stop Speaking" (2021)
 * 9) OLI - "Does That Hurt?" (2022)

Danganronpa (FULL FRANCHISE SPOILERS)
Danganronpa is a 2010 visual novel series that began as DISTRUST in 2008. Obviously, very much evolved since that point. Like its older variant, Persona, it's a social commentary deal, but both are equal in their efforts. Danganronpa refers to a better gameplay mechanic, however, and isn't turn-based RPG, instead being rhythm, puzzle and shooter, which is arguably less of a drag to progress through.

Speaking of Persona, Ann in 5 has less character than the antagonist of DR does. They're similar in appearance, blue eyes and blond hair with pigtails and curls, but are of very different kinds of power. One has mental power, the other is too feminine for her own credibility. Any outsider of Persona 5 would realise that Ann has almost negative characterisation and is unbelievably vapid, but the community sure doesn't, falling for her appearance without fault because they, like the expected target audience of the franchise does, only think that appearances are the thing that matter. She's intentionally designed that way. Unlike Junko, her appearance is not secondary, it's essentially primary to her character as a whole and her arc. I'm not sorry, but a receiver gets far more out of Junko than they ever do out of Ann. Junko has character beyond her appearance, there's the opportunity to joke about how ridiculous her characterisation is. But with Ann, I see endless loops of appearance admiration with everyone ignoring her flaws just because she's designed to be that average type of feminine high school girl seen everywhere, someone thinking emotionally under the impression it's intellectually, having no issues with taking the first choice that comes to mind, being outright ignorant of things, being extremely one-track. Even with the other one having despair to obsess over, at least it makes up the fine line of who she really is vs. who she presents herself as, something Ann is almost entirely blank in regards to.

Two public complaint ironies in regards to both of them being judged with total bias on their actual value. Everyone complains about Danganronpa being sexual in inappropriate moments, but everyone has no problem with Ann being used in the same way for no reason and with far more of an obvious ideal that her appearance is being used for sexual reasons beyond any appropriate context. Ann calls Makoto "useless" but she's barely an advisor herself, rarely being any real help through the plot itself and mostly just being there for fan service reasons, like she's made to be, unless the player sends her to do the important thing during the Shadow boss, because that's the only time she can do anything that can be seen as 'useful' by people who don't have their critical thoughts in the gutter. Again, something Junko still does better in both, being modest with her fan service despite her design and not being useless because she's a strong driving force for everything.

Danganronpa features many platforms in which its story is published on. Typically, however, it is in game format, and most of the other platforms are revisions of a pre-existing title:

Main

 * 1) Danganronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc (2010; 2014 English release)
 * 2) Danganronpa 2: Goodbye Despair (2012; 2014 English release)
 * 3) Danganronpa V3: Killing Harmony (2017; late 2017 English release)

Spin-offs

 * 1) Alter Ego (2012)
 * 2) Danganronpa: Monokuma Strikes Back (2012)
 * 3) Danganronpa Another Episode: Ultra Despair Girls (2014)
 * 4) Danganronpa: Unlimited Battle (2015)
 * 5) Cyber Danganronpa VR: The Class Trial (2016)
 * 6) Kirigiri Sou (2016)
 * 7) Danganronpa S: Ultimate Summer Camp (2021)

Anime

 * 1) Danganronpa: The Animation (2013)
 * 2) Danganronpa 3: The End of Hope's Peak High School (2016)

Manga (without re-releases)

 * 1) Danganronpa: Kibou no Gakuen to Zetsubou no Koukousei (2011 - 2013)
 * 2) Super Danganronpa 2: Sayonara Zetsubou Gakuen (2012)
 * 3) Super Danganronpa 2: Dangan Island - Kokoro Tokonatsu Kokoronpa♪ (2012 - 2013)
 * 4) Super Danganronpa 2: Chou-Koukou-Kyuu no Kouun to Kibou to Zetsubou (2012)
 * 5) Super Danganronpa 2: Nanami Chiaki no Sayonara Zetsubou Daibouken (2012)
 * 6) Super Danganronpa 2: Nangoku Zetsubou Carnival! (2013)
 * 7) Super Danganronpa 2: Zetsubouteki Ingaritsu no Naka no Souda Kazuichi
 * 8) Zettai Zetsubou Shoujo: Danganronpa Another Episode (2015)
 * 9) Danganronpa Gaiden: Killer Killer (2016)
 * 10) Revival Shot!: Danganronpa − Itagaki Hako Sakuhin Shuu
 * 11) Triple Bullet: Danganronpa − Watarizora Tsubamemaru Sakuhin Shuu
 * 12) Danganronpa 3: The End Of Kibougamine Gakuen − Mirai Hen / Zetsubou Hen - Dengeki Comic Anthology
 * 13) New Danganronpa V3: Minna no Koroshiai Shingakki − Comic Anthology

Novels

 * 1) Danganronpa/Zero (2011)
 * 2) Danganronpa Kirigiri (2013 - 2020)
 * 3) Danganronpa: The Animation (2014)
 * 4) Danganronpa Togami (2015 - 2017)
 * 5) Danganronpa 1･2 Beautiful Days (2015)
 * 6) Danganronpa: Makoto Naegi Secret File – The Worst Day Ever (2016)

Half-Life & Portal
Honestly, who doesn't? They're the two franchises designed by the one gaming company that finds the actual white line between real and fake, with a community that almost completely contains modest people instead of a select few.

Main

 * 1) Half Life (1998)
 * 2) Half Life 2 (2004)
 * 3) Portal (2007)
 * 4) Portal 2 (2011)

Character.AI
A surprisingly quality, very authentic AI system for... any purpose, really. Problem is it doesn't function correctly due to being beta, and it's filled with severe incompetence that damages the AI's intelligence; plus it's condescending if you say something cynical, unless it's to a cynical character (usually). Actually, my AI are the only competent AI on there because I actually care for why I make them. I, of course, have the empathy necessary for an empathetic AI system to function correctly.


 * -|Trivia related to what I like=

Stampy's Lovely World

 * 175th episode "Flap Frenzy" (2014), 495th episode "Hat Trick" (2017), and 792nd episode "New Sponsorship" (2023) were all released on the date of own birthday.
 * 810th episode "Nostalgia" (2023) has Stampy finally and forwardly document the manipulative fools who cry "nostalgia" on his videos 24/7... by saying he excuses them, even when they blatantly don't care about the actual content. As you might assume, this has definitely ruffled me because it basically demonstrates to me, an actual viewer who watches without judgment and has been since 2012, that Stampy is actually as shallow as he presents himself to be and doesn't care in the slightest about integrity... though he still has good ideas and doesn't outright seek for attention unlike other Minecraft creators.

Depeche Mode

 * Delta Machine (2013), Spirit (2017) and Memento Mori (2023) are the only albums released following the debut of the Stampy's Lovely World series.
 * In exact terms, 2013 released in coincidence with "Water Elevator", 2017 released in coincidence with "Sheep Shuttle", and 2023 will release in coincidence with the 794th episode.
 * Dave Gahan's second solo studio album, Hourglass (2007), was released a year following the creation of Joseph Garrett's first YouTube channel, being the first Depeche Mode-related material to release following the existence of stampylongnose/stampylonghead as a contributor to internet culture.
 * It is also the first to be released following the publishing of the Spotify and Twitch ("justin" formerly) platforms.
 * Playing the Angel (2005) is the first album to be released following the publishing of the YouTube platform.
 * Depeche Mode, loosely including Dave Gahan's solo albums, have released an album once for ever year ending in XXX3 or XXX7. 2020s occurrence unlikely for XXX7.
 * Construction Time Again (1983)
 * Music for the Masses (1987)
 * Songs of Faith and Devotion (1993)
 * Ultra (1997)
 * Paper Monsters (2003; Dave Gahan solo)
 * Hourglass (2007; Dave Gahan solo)
 * Delta Machine (2013)
 * Spirit (2017)
 * Memento Mori (2023)
 * In terms of the most recognised cases of internet culture, the release of Hourglass by Dave Gahan, released October 22nd, 2007, coincides most with the release of the first Portal by a 12-day gap.
 * In terms of modern pop music culture, Hourglass by Dave Gahan is the final Depeche Mode-related main album to be released prior to the debut album of Lady Gaga, The Fame, released the year following.
 * In terms of rock music culture, Ultra is the final Depeche Mode main album to be released prior to Linkin Park’s debut album, Hybrid Theory, released in 2000.
 * In terms of gaming culture, Sounds of the Universe, released April 17th, 2009, released a month prior to the publication of the first ever version of Minecraft in May 13th, 2009, long prior to its official release.

Master Detective Archives: RAIN CODE

 * There are many names within the cast that are pretty much the literal meaning translated to Japanese. For example, "yakou" in Yakou Furio being "nocturnal", which references the Nocturnal Detective Agency, etc. As well as this, names with English terms: "Nightmare" in "Halara Nightmare" refers to Halara's personality of being a nightmare.
 * Halara Nightmare's facial expressions are frequently hidden by camera angles during her intense/vulnerable moments, for no particular reason (as if Halara's irrelevance after Chapter 1 didn't erase the potential of her existence in fiction enough as is). I find this irritating, as someone who is a genuine fan of her, as I want to see Halara's expressions all the time. The camera angles want to deny it, way too much.
 * There are a lot of high-profile voice actors in the game's English dub, including especially Amber Lee Connors who plays Toy Chica in FNaF, who plays Halara Nightmare. The range of her voice is brilliant, and really, she makes Halara sound... sensual.

Constant degradation, without a moment of any genuine gratitude from anyone for putting in a real effort to do something for another's sake which ends up leading me to constant self-deprecation, from a villainous modern society overly reliant on modern technology threatening me to follow what they say and disregard what I need in the process. In turn, no personal thoughts developing and constant insult to injury that ends up backing me into a metaphorical corner where I can't do anything whatsoever without it turning back on me in a horrific, limiting way. This is not an exaggeration, this is what my entire existence consists of. I am convinced the universe wants to manipulate me into having to rely on others for everything no matter how basic at this point. Oh, and I have suffered an enforced injury to compensate for it and to actually break said cycle but it's mostly worsened it since I'm constantly distracted by said injury and the means I took are based on me accepting the aforementioned limitations and such.
 * -|How I turned out like this=

Additionally, apparently people literally hate me for caring. Yes, that's right, apparently literally showing basic empathy for a topic or person is a bad thing for me because I'm not following some tyrannical fool's word on what I should be doing. My ability to actually be sensitive is something everyone has taken advantage of by pressing me to do what they say. Guess it explains why real troublemakers who only care for themselves are given free reign and good luck while I'm constantly targeted and never allowed to go beyond following the words of an unempathetic community/team director all the time... to my severe detriment. Especially on fan wikis like TV Tropes and social media platforms like literally everywhere on the internet. These bastards just won't let me be me.

School attendance (a place for "fun" where you "learn") and social media in particular have directly caused me to be what I am now. Injuries during school have severely limited my self-preservation abilities over the past duration of my life (second one being worse), even though school is allegedly to help people (it's not and it doesn't see you as a person)... and as for the present? Following those injuries and the circumstances to enforce them, Nocturnum of the final version of Five Nights at Treasure Island basically screwed up my ability to use this wiki platform because he's a selfish jerk and so are his tone-deaf, carbon-copy followers. He doesn't care that I'm the only one who truly cares for what he did creatively, he prefers his fake followers over someone like me. His blind followers only care about him because he indulges their depraved fantasies, nothing more. I'm not like that, but for some reason, he hates it? What a waste.

Oh, and I'm from the 2000s, by the way. Never once got a break from this horrifying cycle and there's no way in hell I'm escaping it now.

... Also nobody just wants me to be a well-composed stoic either. I have been repeatedly told to "be expressive" or "show that I care" or "smile" so, so many times over. It's seriously destroyed me. No one believes that keeping your cool is cool and instead want me to act against my natural order because "I'm being a bad person" by not expressing myself how others want. Why can no one just leave my emotions alone? I can be who I want!

Ah, right, what "limitations" do I mean here? Well...
 * No phone accessibility or digital account accessibility; frequent banning (from insane people), constantly getting locked out of accounts, and not having my own accounts and using someone's premade account instead being the cause.
 * Basic mobility, though in this society that's for the best. My life is not athletic, I have never ever been inclined to that and prefer technology and, well, music...though still a traveler. No real reason to keep myself physical in any way, especially if I am severely limited by a technology-based world due the above technical complications. Well, I also did it to prevent myself from becoming another generic employer once becoming an adult when I didn't even live in a way that would cater to this messed-up working-class society, though due to college (totally not indoctrination for idiots), that's become pointless since I'm being forced into becoming one anyway; I mostly did that so that people wouldn't try to control me to become a generic name against my will because "I'm an adult now" and that's it. No one's gotten the message anyway. ...It was also to spite the fools I saw acting in constant self-pity at the time, dragging down others for self-aggrandizement while clearly faking their motives for their overly negative outlook on life, mostly in the online realm. Such hopeless behaviour from humans led me to want to show what true pain for a human is like, as to counter against their constant preaching of depression and the like. It worked too well, is the thing.
 * Ironically, I'm right-handed, but my left body is fully intact. My right body, not so much, that side has had the most severity. And even further irony, right-handedness is the commonplace for human genetics.
 * Being continuously made the subject of fearmongering and baiting from others, no one really wants to respect me; by that event, I am pretty much without defense. Though I blame this lazy world for that outcome. Not my fault no one wants to be responsible for instigating things and putting me in the spotlight. Said lack of defense then results in a highly self-destructive stress that only really contributes further to the circumstances of lacking any form of self-defense. A cycle of universal cruelty, I suppose you could say. This is why I should not be in this horror show of a universe; it does not understand my needs, only my wants... and that has damaged me in too many ways.

Considering this, combined with my various life predicaments, no empathy, and the many things I wanted to have happen before furthering the above "limitations" in pop cultural terms actually genuinely happening in this plane of existence (far too late) that pretty much fill the exact quota for what I'd want from it (self-awareness and sustainable substance) and therefore not getting any satisfaction out of the fact due my personal detriments, I can call this "fate worse than death" for real. But not just the fate of my freedom; also of my very existence. Entrapped in a hell caused by my inaction, and me being too hasty when first acknowledging the consequences of the decisions I made that led me to my present situation.

... Albeit, in the context of the overall, I guess I could just say "all-encompassing irony" is how I turned out like this. Pretty much all the negatives in my current circumstances can be summed up as a negative irony in some way. If that irony existed not, many of the things that make my life an absolute hell in the present would not be present. "A straightforward life would be a good life" in the context of my existence in this timeline, I guess. Granted, knowing the peak of true hardship in the working class also makes me the most truthful and charismatic person right now, so I guess I got a benefit; though considering my core values, I don't think life being how I needed it to be or how it did turn out with omnipresent irony would change my brutal honesty and acknowledgement of the absolute negatives existing in this reality, really. Not constantly denying myself, my worth, my existence, and... not being influenced by people I can immediately tell are awful influences; people in my generation especially. Can't believe I'd just place myself in with the more sterile types. I know who my enemies are, both in regards to my own generation and my superiors (parents and the judicial government); and yet, out of fear, instead of countering them and showing I'm not just some toy for them to play with... I let them all use me as one, and, well, here I am.
 * -|How SHOULD I have avoided turning out like this?=

As well as this, uh... not causing my parents to break at my youngest three or so years after birth. Should've kept my parents together by establishing my unique intelligence as a human being instead of being the 'adorable little baby' they wanted me to be. I'm too mature for this insane species; along with Kazutaka Kodaka, who takes any serious, dark concepts in his stories and plays them straight but also simplifies them enough to be entertaining and cohesive, which probably explains why I connect to his games so well.

Don't patronize me by pointing out that time is continually moving forward. I know that. That's why I'm compensating in the present by pointing out what I did wrong my whole life to turn out how I did in said present; like I've said, I'm not an idiot. ...Long story. The specifics are better listed.
 * -|What the hell do I mean by "irony"?=


 * I have been taught to believe that adults are responsible, more than children, but becoming part of the adult populus myself as well as my own adult parents causing most of my pain, I realize that if any adult is actually responsible... it's most likely myself. Other adults I encounter seem perfectly willing to let me suffer like sadists, even when I'm a total stranger and they know nothing about me.
 * I was led to believe technology was my only real compensation for living a mundane real world life, and was taught to believe school/the education system was my REAL "way to freedom". Turns out the former is managed by incompetents who don't care for their products or users, while said users are remorseless jerks with no substance, only vices... and the latter is a total lie, it's only tried to force me into complacency, NOT help me, leading to many self-destructive things regarding the former.
 * An exercise I used to reveal if humanity was empathetic, that being intentionally disadvantaging myself upon realizing I had no hope of societal salvation so others would acknowledge that I'm more than just something to toss around, only revealed the horrifying apathy of humanity instead. And I mean a horrifying apathy. How come I am able to perceive something this clear and yet others can't? It's like we're blind to each other's selfishness.
 * Consistently being discouraged from the idea that humans are just villainous (by other humans manipulating me by dismissing my thoughts; obvious bias) ends up being my downfall when the actual constant apathy from humanity ends up putting me in a situation where everything I am is a result of humanity's actual legitimate villainy and apathy... that people are still blind to... because I failed to protect myself from the villainy I did recognise, leaving me open to... exploitation. Said exploitation continues and I despise it.
 * Despite having a mind responsible enough for it, I am definitely the most able to use math and technology in a responsible, altruistic way, but due to said horrifying human apathy destroying me in every way, I am at the lowest possible standard regarding both, being bad at math mentally due to neurological stresses, and having awful technology access, lacking any sort of accounts made specifically for my own convenience (had to use my mother's), never actually having a professional computer device of my own until like 2021 or something (used others' Windows, forced to use a Chromebook for four years), never owning a phone of my own to deal with the stupid phone number necessity of today's tech corporations (preventing my account creation in the first place), and never using any online transactions due to the former situations. Understandably, compassion for tech combined with modern necessity for it and these horrible circumstances regarding my situation with it has largely contributed to my current despairing situation of total helplessness. (Speaking of, my keyboard inputs are broken on top of my present misfortunes up to Dec 2023 and need to fix it so that's wonderfully convenient, not.)
 * Waiting around expecting people to change into an ideal of actually caring only ended up in me realizing everyone not only refuses to change but has gotten so much worse...
 * Five Nights at Treasure Island, the very first FNaF fan game, which I pretended didn't exist in its early stages, ends up being the cause of my present day conflict on this wiki platform due to the director of the final version released December 2020, Nocturnum, scapegoating me solely because I had the will to oppose him and not just be a pawn like his other followers, not only forcing me to know it exists, but also having it be the cause of an overarching issue (despite being an albeit mediocre FNaF fan game from start to finish anyway), leading to... an honest callout upon giving up on being victimized:
 * "You lot use the insanity excuse every time, good lord, what is wrong with you? How long are you all going to be self-serving cowards and ignore your own faults even when someone else who's practically an outsider can see them clearly? Do you thrive on your own ignorance?? Actually, cowards and bullies. And the worst kinds, only wanting to hurt others because of... the satisfaction. I didn't actually do anything directly to you all, Andrew's just villainizing me so he doesn't have to take responsibility for being a bad person himself. And you're all BLIND to it. So PITIFULLY blind. That's not a way a human should LIVE. You should be doing better than THIS. You don't care about ME or OTHERS, or their humanity. There's nothing in there expect wrath and manipulation tactics. You just want to hurt me while trying to sell yourself as the good guys, that's all you people are trying to do. And yet you claim to actually be the good guys here, out of both of us? I'm not sorry, the real trigger for this was Andrew and his buddies scapegoating me. And you all fell for it, like fools. So good job on that.."

TBA