Thread:Imamadmad/@comment-24200325-20150630070938/@comment-4189499-20150630165339

For the sake of future reference, this refers to this chat log, specifically the posts between 07:56 and 08:19.

First of all, the troll who started this current mess on chat has his IP address located in the Czech Republic, if that helps track down the identity of the sock-puppeteer. That troll was an arsehole, and I'm allowed to say that because that is the most accurate term to describe them and their behaviour and this isn't CCSW. He, or she, is a bloody coward who had to go anonymous to say bad things about you. You don't have to feel offended by what losers like that think. If they don't have the courage to say it under their own username, then they're not worth your attention :)

The other users' reactions, on the other hand, is a different story. I have read all their comments in the log that day, and have the relevant ones highlighted in a file on my computer for future reference. The chat log is slightly more bearable to read than chat itself! The thing is, those users are generally trustworthy users of CCSW and people who play a large part in the community. While the things they're saying about you aren't nice, the exasperation in their tone is clear. It is important to understand why these people are getting angry at you, as they're obviously not just trolls out to attack you, although they really shouldn't have been leaving messages like that both in a public place and behind your back. Instead of just feeling insulted, consider what aspects of your behaviour might be sparking these negative feelings in the other users. This is in no way entirely your fault, but by the same token, neither is it entirely Emma's fault, nor entirely Courtemanche's fault. Let us have a look at what they're saying, ignoring the not entirely helpful way in which it was said, and see if we can use it as constructive criticism rather than an attack on you. You can't change Emma or Courtemanche's attitudes and behaviours, but you can change the way you respond to situations to make sure this never happens again.

To put it bluntly, the other users are getting tired of you constantly telling people off if they ask for levels to be buffed. Now, I know you don't like it when levels are buffed, and neither do I, but, and I mean this in the nicest way possible, it is very annoying when you keep. Going. On. About. Buffs. The comments on the subject are repetitive and slightly whiny. I am saying this not to be mean but so you know honestly how others perceive your messages, and so you can improve the way you present yourself.

Look, I know that you're scared that King will actually pay attention to people's comments and increase the difficulty of a level, but this is one instance where you can take comfort in how unimportant the comments on that wiki are. If King has even ever read the comments, I doubt they'd give two hoots about the opinions of a single person asking for a level to be buffed, similar to how they completely ignore just about all cries for levels to be nerfed. You can rest assured that any trolls that are trying to provoke a reaction by asking for levels to be buffed will have no impact on what King does with the game. By responding to their buff requests, you are actually giving the trolls exactly what they want; a reaction. The best thing to do when you encounter trolls such as that, or really of any nature, is to hold your head up high and ignore them. Trolls aren't worth your precious time.

On another point, people are allowed to hold the position that they believe a level would be improved by buffing, and they are well within their rights to express that view. You are also well within your rights to disagree with them, but if you wish to express that disagreement, please do so politely and maturely rather than trying to jump to the defence of the level by posting messages asking for people not to express their opinions on buffing. It is more respectful, and a nicer welcome to new users who might be making their first comment on the wiki. Remember what I've told you before: you are a representative of the wiki, so you need to put your best foot forward in all situations, and if you find yourself in a situation where you start to feel upset, go away and watch some cat videos for a little while to calm yourself down before responding. Or watch a few episodes of a good TV show. I can give you recommendations if you need any! My best advice is, never leave anyone a message while you're upset. It never ends well. Never. It will always come back to hurt you later. Give yourself time to calm down and see through the fog of anger to what the person is actually intending to mean, and with this clarity it is much easier to leave a more tactful response, if any response is needed at all, than if you were to reply immediately.

Look Rose, I know you're a hard working user and just want everyone to play nice. I know you are a good person with good intentions, but you just need to work on turning good intentions into good action! If Lefty or the other bureaucrats start talking about deadminning you, I will put in a vote of confidence for you to give you more time to prove yourself, to grow more mature. However, you will only be able to hang on to your admin rights if you show that you're actively trying to grow and improve in the way you interact with people.

One thing that will get you a lot of brownie points is if you go over to CCSW forums right now and leave an apology about your attitude towards buffs, and promise to ignore any further comment with the word buff in it, and then stick to that promise. That would be demonstrating a high level of maturity, and will show that you're willing to respond to feedback and grow with it. Of course, you don't have to do that, but I would recommend that you do.

Similarly, with your other interactions, try to never take any comment personally. If you take comments personally, you'll get offended, and then you'll get angry. If you find yourself feeling offended or attacked by a comment, perhaps go away again and let yourself calm down for a bit before returning to respond. Remember too that any emotion or sarcasm is completely lost in textual communication, so the person leaving the message probably didn't mean to come across as offensive as they did. If you keep this in mind, you will again help to moderate your response to people. Another important skill to learn also is to not let it affect you so much when people genuinely do intend malice in their comments. I know "grow a thicker skin" is easier said than done, but if you can manage it, it will make every aspect of your life easier, including relationships with others on the wiki.

I'm going to finish writing and post this now because I've just spent 2 hours writing this thing. I really need to work on keeping messages short! Anyway, I do hope you listen to my advice. I know my response might not have been what you were hoping for, but I can see a genuine basis for Emma and Couche's comments, and it is a problem which can only be solved by you. It is very true that they did not say the nicest things towards you, and that they shouldn't have said those things behind your back, especially not to such a wide audience, but instead of getting angry at them for leaving those messages, we can look at it the other way and think about how lucky it is that you got the chance to see others' completely honest reflections on your behaviour so you can use that feedback to improve. Every cloud has a silver lining, no matter how stormy the cloud is! And just in case things turn even more sour, I have a record of all their comments within that exchange with the relevant details highlighted sitting on my computer, so nobody can tamper with the evidence. But for the time being, let's just take this as a learning experience and see if we can use this information to turn you into an even greater admin! Just remember to be humble and not to get offended too easily, and don't feed the trolls, and you should be fine. Oh, and stop talking about buffs! :)