User:CherryChaplin



= Artissimo Valiano (Conspiracy Theory/Urban Legend) =

Summary:
Artissimo Valiano - the legendary Holy Roman Emperor, Lion Of Rome, and Savior of the Nations. Artissimo Valiano is a modern urban legend/conspiracy theory stemming from ancient folklore and real historical figures. Valiano is described as an interdimensional time-traveling archangel, considered one of the five great archangels described in the biblical scriptures. He is said to be the benevolent puppetmaster of Europe, the Grandmaster of the Most Sacred and Ancient Order of the Victorious Sun, and engaged in a thousand-year-long war against the Reptilians, Ancient Aliens, Anunnaki, and Illuminati.

Valiano sits upon the High Throne of Heaven and ranks at the very top of the angelic hierarchy serving as the Prince of Heaven, King of the Angels, and Master of the Archangels. Artissimo Valiano (with the angelic name of Jupiter Sanguinius) is the greatest and most powerful of all angels, only tied in terms of strength, with Saint Michael the Archangel. Valiano is also regarded as a great warrior and brilliant swordsman, famously defeating the devil in personal combat. His military genius can not go unmentioned, as he has never lost a battle and often smashes armies anywhere from twenty to a hundred times his number, with minimal losses. According to legend, Artissimo Valiano leads the wild hunt across the skies hunting demonic hordes and monsters in his free time.

Valiano serves as the Archangel of Art, Royalty, & Power. The Emperor is widely hailed as the champion of freedom and protector of liberty. Patron of Rome & LandChads. He is often associated with Victory, Success, Prosperity, Physical Beauty, Wealth, Health, and Happiness. Valiano is rumored to possess a 790 IQ, Artistic Genius, and an incalculable angelic intelligence. In the modern-day, Artissimo Valiano is said to live as a billionaire philanthropist and world-famous artist in a lavish castle located in the French Alps.

Some of the Holy Roman Emperor's most notable feats: Slaying the Gnostic Demiurge and wiping out the Archons; Slaying Leviathan (the Multiversal Serpent), & Defeating Satan in personal combat.

Titles:
"Behold! By the Grace of God, His Holy and Imperial Majesty, Emperor Artissimo Valiano the First with the Angelic Name of Jupiter Sanguinius, the Divine Optochad, the Gigachad of Gigachads, the Chad of All Chads, Alpha of All Alphas, Sigma of All Sigmas, Emperor of Emperors, King of Kings, Honorary Brother of Christ, Crown of the High Throne of Heaven, Prince of Heaven, King of the Angels, Master of the Archangels, Lord of the Seraphim, Holy Roman Emperor, LandChad of the Planet Venus, Lion of Rome, Savior of the Nations, Artistic Genius of the Universe, Champion of Freedom, Protector of Liberty, & Defender of the Innocent."

Description:
It is prophesized that Valiano will usher in a ten-thousand-generation golden age for all of humanity and ascend each and every human being into the GigaChad Human Race. Artissimo Valiano will restore the true Holy - Roman - Empire and establish a universal realm led and ruled by humanity.

It is rumored every Winter Solstice if a person were to donate a small portion of money to charity and leave a red candle outside at night, Saint Valiano would bless them with wealth, health, and happiness.

History:
Saint Artissimo Valiano the Archangel is descended from Jesus Christ & the Ancient Royal Bloodline (All the Royal Houses of Europe being descended from Jesus Christ and Mary Magdalene). Artissimo Valiano is considered an "Ascended Archangel" being both fully archangel and fully man; in the same model of Christ (with Christ being fully God and fully man at the same time). Saint Artissimo the Archangel was born into the Noble and Most Ancient House of Valiano, one of the founding patrician families of Rome and one of the most illustrious dynasties in European history.

Artissimo Valiano was born in Florence, Italy on July 23rd, 1120 A.D. to Holy Roman Emperor Leonardo Corleone di Valiano and Holy Roman Empress Serafina Alessandra di Valiano. By the time Artissimo Valiano had reached just two months old, he had already developed his lifelong passion for art and painting. Astonishingly, at just six months old, Artissimo Valiano had gained complete mastery over art and all of her techniques. At the age of eight months old, Artissimo Valiano had finished his first masterpiece artwork, far surpassing all of the best artists of his day.