User:MaxieLaughsALot

DYLAN O'BRIEN IS BAE.

TEEN WOLF IS LYYYFFEE.

And I Watch Almost Every Show On The CW Lol.

People think..... I'm skinny, but I'm really chunky. I'm cheap, but I'm really thrifty. I'm blonde, but I'm really a brunette. I'm nosy, but I'm really curious.

If you have $20 and Chuck Norris has $5, he has more money than you. When Chuck Norris plays monopoly the entire world's economy is shaken. Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open. Chuck Norris managed to count to infinity.. twice! When Chuck does push-ups he doesn't move, the earth moves.Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light on, not because he's afraid of the dark, but because the dark is afraid of him. Why does Chuck Norris' calendar go directly from March 31 to April 2nd? Nobody fools Chuck Norris!Chuck Norris is so amazing he can: Light ants on fire with a magnifying glass. Slam a revolving door. Make the boogie man scared. Clap with one hand. Chuck Norris has a bear carpet in his house, the bear isn't dead its just afraid to move. Enough about Chuck Norris.

It's not important to win, it's important to make the other guy lose.

A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.

I believe there should be a better way to start each day... instead of waking up every morning.

Lead us not into temptation. Just tell us where it is; we'll find it.

I'm not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.

A zoology teacher asks the class 'What is the one animal in the jungle that a lion is afraid of?' The class answers: a lioness.

A stupid person laughs three times at a joke; once when everyone else is laughing, a second time when he actually gets the joke, and a third time when he realizes he was laughing without getting the joke at first.

The broccoli says 'I look like a small tree', the mushroom says 'I look like an umbrella', the walnut says 'I look like a brain', and the banana says 'Can we please change the subject?'

I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me, the table and chairs are bullies, and the walls get in my way

God Bless