Thread:Sannse/@comment-36.37.130.191-20150816081303/@comment-5810007-20150819151024

So you wanna know how to make friends, eh? I'll tell ya.

Have swag. I have a lot of swag. I ooze with swag. Someone once poked me with a stick, and that stick became covered in my swag. That stick was immediatly my friend. What does this mean? Swag=Friends. If you have no swag, then you have no friends. Now you may be thinking, "how do I get swag"? Oh boy, I'll tell you. You have to steal swag from swag pimps. It's easy enough, like taking swag from a baby. But not a baby, a swag pimp. Keep in mind swag pimps are *not* like normal pimps. They're totally legal. Stealing swag is legal too. How do you steal swag from a swag pimp? Make a mixtape. Seriously. Make a mixtape. Gotta be hot fyre my friend. Hot hot hot hot FYRE. After you get the mixtape done, go to the swagpimp, say a cool one liner, then drop your mixtape. If it's fyre enough (and if you do it right, it will be fyre enough) the swag pimp will catch on fire and start burning alive. While he's burning alive, steal his swag, call 911, and order a firetruck to extinguish your mixtape. The firefighters have to be very skilled to take down a fyre mixtape, but firefighters are cool so they'll manage. Anyways, congrats, you now have acquired swag. Cool. Kosher. Halal. Dandy. Legit. Swag. Everyone will want to be your friend, because you have swag. And swag is swag.