Thread:Mooziq/@comment-38556186-20190404022944/@comment-38556186-20190418111945

Hey Moo-Moo.

I was wondering if I could have the list of Suicide hotlines again. I just feel more comfortable when you listed them to me. I don't know Im so scared of calling 911. And I don't know why I have fondess over your fucking Profile Picture either. But I guess I do, and for reason that helps me through alot..

Im really sorry for using up your time. I know you probably think Im "trolling" because of my certain tendities or maybe you think Im mad. I dont know. I dont really wanna know. I like thinking that you read through my messages such as these and go like,"ah shit, not this kid again," and  ignore me. I mean, thats what most people do so I just assume that.

I guess its because I know there's a person on the other side taking their time into reading what I have to say excites me. Their living, beating heart pounding against the void in my head and ringing my ears until I begin choking- on what, excitement? God, why can't I be normal.

It seems that I can't be normal, but I haven't been feeling myself. I don't know what myself even is. Everything else is still here. Everything that makes me is still here. Except for this empty feeling. Maybe it's because I haven't been able to use certain substances to relax myself. Maybe its the guilt I know...

Im rambling, aren't I?